your a redneck if…….

You think paprika is a Third World country.
You refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the “day my ship came in.”
None of your shirts cover your stomach.
Thanksgiving dinner was ruined because you ran out of ketchup.
Your wife has ever said, “Come move this transmission so I can take a bath.”
There’s an expired license plate hanging on your living room wall.
Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
You’ve ever been pumping gas and another customer asks you to check his oil.
You think the Bud Bowl is real.
You consider dating second cousins as “playing the field”.
You think “six to ten pounds” on the side of the Pampers box means how much the diaper will hold.

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